​The Future Tense of Shit is a Fairytale That Never is.

Once upon a time, (because what’s a fairy tale without these 4 words?), there lived a black queen in her world. No, she didn’t own a castle, she owned the world. In her skin was the power to command social media trends, to pull envy, hate, malice, wars, laws, acts, deeds and to push love, happiness and a truck load of glow. And glow she did, more than the other two. Happiness did elude her many times; most times and love, she had just gotten acquainted with Love and she had yet to fully grasp this implication. 

This queen pulled through different sojourns of life until social media taught her that she should love herself but social media also taught her she needed to get lighter skin to be considered beautiful, she needed to have space between her legs to get noticed, she needed the perfect 8 figure, a lighter skin too, social media had been her companion through most of life and she had come to trust and recognize it’s judgment as proper. 

But social media’s not always correct queen. It told her a couple of years later to embrace her skin, and her thick thighs, full lips and all that she came -. And she learned to flaunt that because girls like her were finally a trend. Full on the high of dopamine, satisfaction evaded her and emotions ruled her reactions. 

Heart break stemming from her need of acceptance was her jolt of adrenaline. It seemed she had woken from a deep slumber. She found God; or rather he found her and had been calling her, and so found God who is love. She flunked grades and made some but she won’t stop pushing. She lost friends and gained one, the best of the best. She gave love, and spat on the demonstration and declaration of love from others. She learned to rein in her emotions, that these emotions don’t control her reactions. She made a lot of mistakes but she never took off that crown, crowned in glory by the king of kings.


This queen has come to understand the power of determination, making plans, following after them and that she can chase after her dreams. She wouldn’t chase blindly, her God is within her, and she cannot fail; he leads her everyday by His spirit. (Psalm 46:5)

I am this queen. 

Tell me, are you glo’in? Are you ruling your world? (Did you get the pun?) 

Read my 2015 epilogue? See where this queen has been. Warning: You MIGHT not understand this current post without reading this one in the link here. 


Dividing doctrine: Women of the Corinthian Church 2 (1 Cor 11:2-16)

In an earlier article with the same title, I set about to set the base work for this in depth explanation this chapter would have, flooring the incorrect assumption by many in the body of Christ that all women must cover their hair in places of worship. I explained why Paul gave these direct instructions to the women of the Corinthian Church which was to maintain order (which was greatly lacking) and signify submission. Article here.

Feedback from you all demand that I plunge deeper, to explain in simpler language the text contained in the title. What can we learn from it?

Starting at verse 3 of the focus verses, Paul says the head of every man is Christ and the head of the woman is man and the head of Christ is God. Without putting these verses in proper context, it will appear as if God is higher than Christ who is higher than men who is higher than the women. When we say higher, the first thing that comes to mind is inferiority or supremacy, popular human concepts that some would agree on, others would disagree. It is however popular belief that men are superior to women, the feminist would never agree.

Before you cast your stones at me, feminists, do you agree that God is superior to Christ? Many would boldly say yes, some others would falter at giving answer but before the word of God all our opinions would fall, only his word will stand true.

At Philippians 2:6, we see Christ being in very nature, God (NIV), Hebrews 1:3 tells us that the son (Christ) is the exact representation of His being (NIV) and John 1:1 rounds it up clearly, “In the beginning was the word and the word was with God and the word was God. So who is the word? Reading the same chapter down to verse 14, “….the only begotten of the father, full of grace and truth”, the word is Christ Jesus.

Would you say Christ who is in very nature, God, is inferior to God? The head of Christ is God. What would Paul have meant; Superiority or Submission?

In a world like ours, these words will seem to mean one and the same thing such that any idea of submission is accepted only if the one being submitted to is a superior but let us look at the example of Jesus Christ here on earth at Phillipians 2:5-8 (an example we should hold on to for our relationships here on earth). Christ did not consider equality with God as anything but instead he humbled and submitted himself like a servant; a man to die for our sakes by God’s will. This is submission. Not on the basis of status but on the basis of respect for one another, honoring each other above even ourselves just as is stipulated in Romans 12:10.

The head of Christ is God could definitely not connote superiority but submission. Let us put it this way instead, Christ being the Son of God, the head in that sentence not literally but figuratively meaning the origin or source. Now we could readily substitute in the various sentences to be:

The source of Christ is God (Christ, the son of God)

The source of Man is Christ (Christ, who with God made man)

The source of the Woman is Man (The woman was made out of the man).

Submission is therefore clearly stated as the base work for Paul’s instruction in this chapter. Submission teaching us to drop human wisdom before the wisdom of God contained in his word, Christ Jesus, teaching us to have great love and respect for one another even as we have all been called to the same purpose and hope of his glorious calling.

My Style: That Vintage School Look

Holla! It’s Friday guys! Not that I’ll be spending the weekend drinking wine because I most likely will be reading, taking care of my skin and sleeping but I’m so excited the working part of the week is coming to an end, I still have a couple of classes today but I can endure, yes, I can do this! In fact, I’m excited this month is coming to an end. *does happy dance*

A brief recap of my week is in order but I would have to start telling you about classes over and over and that’s no fun. The most hilarious part, however, happened yesterday, I love coming on here to share a lot of this weird stuff with you people, apparently they happen everyday, everywhere.

Yesterday, I was ‘cat called’ (this phrase is correct, right?) on my way to my apartment last night with my roommate, he said and I quote, “Excuse me!” Nigerian ladies will agree with me that this is the most polite you can get anywhere instead of the constant, ‘eissss’, ‘sssss’, ‘fine girl’ and  ‘sister’ that we get every other day. I felt obligated to answer. So we turned around and I said, “Hello, can we help you with something?”

“I pulled over because of you guys”, was his answer while twisting his car keys around his finger, so I look at the junction, and it was taxi I saw there, not saying it’s his car, just mentioning. *coughs* By his tone of voice, he seemed to be implying that we should be grateful he stopped his car on the road to talk to us. So I asked him, “Why did you pull over?”

A pictorial representation of how I was probably laughing!

Apparently I was asking the wrong questions because this Uncle didn’t like this one. He said, “Are you questioning me?”, then he turned and walked away muttering something that sounded like ‘fuck it’. So I’m walking in the opposite direction and I feel I should have asked “what did you pull over? Your shoes, your slippers, your taxi?”

Or what do you guys think?   

You’ve been seeing an outfit look, well, I’ve been getting questions on what my skin care routine is, lately. LOL! It’s laziness, it’s a look! Okay, just kidding! It’s not just drinking water and minding my own business although that is an integral part of my routine, (oh, I also slather coconut oil over my face occasionally and some cocoa butter and coconut oil based cream on my skin) but I’m not particular about taking care of my skin, I personally don’t believe poking and prodding at your skin for results but just letting it flourish. *skin bloggers giving me the stink eye* (DISCLAIMER: This is personal opinion, do what works for you.)

This outfit is what I enjoyed wearing in the 60’s for a stroll outside in the fall and my braids high up. Many of you were not born then but I’m Pharell and Beyonce’s love child so they took me along to the fountain of youth, I think you’ll love it too.

Let me comman be going before someone will beat me on my blog oo!

Jacket: Aunty

Shirt: Owned since 10years old (Exactly 10 years later)

Pants: Brother

Do I even own anything in my wardrobe?

Shoes: Adidas superstar

Look: Original, crafted from my heart, product of contentment and an inner awareness of the life I have in Christ Jesus. This is the real look.

Pictures: Muslimah Ayodolapo Yusuf (The baddest, IG: @__mayphotography)




Dividing Doctrine: The Women of the Corinthian Church

Text from 1 Corinthians 11: 2-16

This text is usually taken and preached to be that all women must cover their hair in places of worship. I will attempt to pull a historical balance to Paul’s instructions in a bid to ascertain if this is really what this text preaches. This is the only portion of the bible that specifies this for the Christian we should be careful to form a doctrine of this especially if direct emphasis is not placed on the subject matter.

The Corinthian Church was a rowdy church if all of Paul’s responses in this first letter are anything to go by. This is (according to bible scholars and theologians) the second letter of Paul to the Corinthians. Paul sends specific replies and answers to questions and news received from the church elders about church activity.

Paul uses the Jewish customs of the day to enforce laws of decency and order in the churches. It was common practice for the women in the Corinthian Church to usurp authority over the teachers (men according to custom) and do so without order as they were inspired to. Paul uses customs they are familiar with to effect order. In verse 16, he emphasizes that they don’t have a custom of content or disorderliness in the churches of God.

The Corinthian Women, recognizing their spiritual equality with men set about to change the natural order of women’s submission to men which was symbolized in the Jewish custom of the day by a veil and seclusion. Paul uses this customs to say, “because of knowledge of our spiritual equality, now even more than ever we should better submit one to another, not only as a woman to a man but also as Christians”.

This case is specific and should not be generalized unless:

  1. You are Jewish or with a custom alike, I mean a woman covering her hair as a symbol of submission and/not excluding
  2. That women at your church usurp authority, that is, behave in an unruly manner towards church leadership trying to take over ordinations and titled posts by force.


Of flawed systems and Ewa Agoyin cravings

Hello friends, I’ve been in a bit of a writers block lately, this is my attempt at not putting out half-assed content that you will not enjoy. This right here is a tale of my adventures with Nigeria’s flawed banking and record keeping systems and what came after that.

It all started last night. I have been broke, that is, i.e, financially decapitated for a while now and I just received a credit alert from my mother, see, my joy then, cannot be described with words. So this happy young woman (I am bound to write in third person, please forgive me, all na gist) rushed out to use the ATM machine late at night.

I should let you in on the circumstances surrounding getting to the ATM and picking money.

  1. I didn’t have a dime on me and neither did my roommate (we were going out together) she in fact, transferred money into my account so that I could aid her to withdraw; she couldn’t find her debit card.
  2. It was about 9pm in the night. This wouldn’t be such a factor if I lived (or schooled, rather) in one of the big cities of Nigeria, I’m talking Lagos, Abuja, Port Harcourt and what have you, but I school in Ilorin, the capital of Kwara State, the most mediocre state I’ve had the pleasure of being in (I’ve not been in many states, mind you), where convenience stores close by 5pm and open by 12pm, and the roads seem to have it’s own closing hours as well, say 8pm (I’m being lenient here).
  3. Because of the above mentioned reason, I had to take a bike, okada, motor cycle etc, instead of the initial trekking that I had planned when leaving my room. At this point, I will refer you back to reason number one and my bargaining with a cyclist, okada man, that I didn’t have the means to pay but I’ve done it before, what could possibly go wrong? I’ll withdraw and pay him. Or so I thought.

We’re at the ATM now and this is where the Palava begins. I put my card in the machine and go through the transactions I want but just at the last moment, the machine says card restricted. I went twice to thrice on different machines getting the same response. “Okay, I’m alright, not shaky at all, this is Nigeria, I can use an Access bank debit card in an Access bank powered machine and still get issues, let me move the money from this account to another”, I happen to have multiple accounts and money in only one of them at a time.

When I opened my mobile app to make the transfer, it was as well declined. Now, this is where the trouble really is. Access bank had finally run mad, at my own expense, I called customer care. I happen to be one sane Nigerian, it’s Christ in me, I didn’t start crying and cursing them for all around to hear, those were hard times though, I had to remind myself that all the worries of this world, in the end are transient only God and his word in Christ will remain. No point dying and crying over spilt milk, let’s find a solution.

If only this Okada man could understand and stop honking like I stole his money, in fact, my roommate had to go placate him. He eventually left without taking pay. I was too busy trying to contact their customer care. It went through pretty quickly, even quicker than Airtel customer care that will make sure you hear all their adverts at least three times before a Call Centre representative gets to you. Do I have a witness in the house?

The representative that took my call, I never listen for their names, in my defense; they don’t care much for mine once the call is terminated. It’s part of the job description, no offence to call centre representatives out there. Anyways, this lady who took my call was pretty nice and tried her best to help me as much as possible but when the root has spoiled, the branches will be shaky!

The man who opened my account (and I’m calling out names and branches now), David from Access Bank, Garki II, Abuja Branch misspelled my name. How do you possibly do that? Even with a copy of my ID card in your possession, it’s just so you can eat commission on my account opening and many others, I’d like to inform you that what is worth doing is worth doing well.

Be patient. Take your time and do your job efficiently, it’s far better than a quick job.

Because of this name difference they had issues linking my BVN to the account. I will once again call out the same branch. I am uncertain in fact, if David is solely to be blamed because when I had done my BVN registration at that same branch, the official who obviously has comprehension problems had turned my surname to first and first name to surname. Why would you do that? Couldn’t you have just asked? Admittedly the order of my names are strange but please, if I fill the form, help me and input it like that, ehn?

But this boils down to something more important, excuse my ranting.

What is the point of having a computerized national data base if it is barely synced?

Some corrections when done in one place could easily reflect on others, I don’t have to jump from place to place looking for how to correct and going through unnecessary bureaucracy or bottle necks.

Nigeria is a failed state, we all know that but fail has never been a permanent tag, neither has success, we have to work to make it better but as for the system, I hope someone who can do something hears this and does something.


This morning, I had to write a power of attorney to my branch, allowing my father access to make certain changes in my account before all restrictions were pulled. To celebrate this success and just like food is always on my side (money is not but food is always and forever), I found Ewa Agoyin. FINALLY!

If you’re on The Blogger Advocate’s WhatsApp group then you’ll remember how I said I’ve never had it before, well, all that has changed now, there’s a woman who sells same close to my residence. I am convinced there is some charm in that sauce, used to spice it that makes the beans taste so good and even as awesome as it tasted, I have to say, I’m not feeling the hype. Maybe this woman was below expectation, or that’s it (this would be really sad though).

Have you had Ewa Agoyin? Tell me, is it that awesome? And have any of this country’s systems let you down lately? Tell me about it?





Own your boyfriends shirt: 3 simple looks

NP: Jesus Lives – Sovereign Grace Music

Mama is back! Who missed me?

hey guys!

I missed blogging and in fact this past month I missed out of a great deal of activities I enjoy doing, your girl is back though, let’s talk about fashion! This post is inspired by my love for huge clothing and my purchase of this big shirt a couple of months ago. So apparently I did not get this shirt from any boys but that would be a convenient, not to mention cheaper, styling option (not that the shirts are bought that way…..hehehe). I bought this shirt at 700 Naira only and i’m pretty sure I’ve worn more than that price out of the shirt.

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Let’s get into it, shall we? It would do you good to note that I wore this shirt backwards, normal is just not my niche I guess, sue me!

Co-operate-ish: Looking for how to switch up your work wear, even for a bit? Then this is definitely worth a try. I wore a mustard midi dress that I styled as skirt with the top over it. The belt clinching at the middle defines the figure and gives it a more feminine edge.  I also popped a couple of top buttons at the back that gave an illusion of a plunging back. I really love how the collar in front looks. Pair this look with pumps and a great bag and be sure to turn heads (what for? I cannot ascertain).

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Back to school (Because I school just resumed for me): This look might be a little illegal in my school and my school only I’m certain. The University of Ilorin which i attend happens to have some strict dress code policies, you will still catch me in school with this outfit, I enjoy tempting the authorities who for the life of me can’t even define this as a breach of any policies. Apparently, their policies are subject to trends and tights have never been much of a trend.

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As a student, does your school have a dress code policy? Which of the policies do you think is most outrageous?

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I popped this outfit with an ankara turban, apparently my fashion niche could be described as afro-urban and I’m all for the movement! This outfit came out pretty casual with scoffed brown oxfords, this are my favorite pair of shoes, so comfortable!

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Casual day-night out: Black skinny jeans effortlessly replaced the tights alongside nude heels and the slimmer belt from look one. I’ve been loving the red trend lately and trust me, I used to dislike the color in anything but lipsticks but I’ve come to embrace just how classy it looks, even just a pop like i had on in this outfit is enough.



There you have it. 1 shirt, 3 looks! What’s your favorite look? And most importantly, I’m curious, will you wear your shirt backwards?

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13 Reasons why….

Hey guys! I’ve been MIA for a while, the Nigerian situation. I don’t even want to get started on that or this post might shift focus. 

MOOD: Feeling unpatriotic but we have Wizkid and Fela ……and yeah, Speedy my boy so we gon’ be alright!

The month past has been a crazy one, September has been adventurous and so many things I’ve never done before; I feel like I’ve grown inches taller, diameters rounder and years wiser, the tall bit is untrue though, I’m dedicated to believe I haven’t grown in that aspect for about 7 years, who knows? 

So there’s this guy I met 2 years and four months ago (I cannot give day, hour and minute specifications), this guy changed so much about the way I see life, loved me, hurt me then loved me some more, this guy changed me. 

And no! He’s not my boyfriend or fiancé! 

Isn’t it strange to see that a human being can affect another so? 

So I decided to douse those flames! On and on I worked, tirelessly, telling my brain to let go of a sensation it frequently welcomed till i was numb from scratching myself inside out. 

I kept hurting myself to get rid of the tickle, like the bitter-sweet sensation of an itch in the middle of your throat – you never get to it. 

And you never know when it fades but I wanted to clean it off, eraser-wipe it off, perhaps tear off that sheet and start afresh – a new slate! 

All I did was blot that ink all over my skin! And I turned your colors in with the darkness of my soul.

Jesus! That got deep real quick! Snap out of it guys! 

Jesus said, “snap out of it!”

In no exact words, of course. And so I did, I let the Lord’s light fill me and touch up all those dark corners and I could see the highlight of gold sprinkled dust from the colors in the darkness. 

I lost him for a moment in all that chaos, how do you forget a man that you’ve lost? 

How do you loose a man that you love?

How is that you – this man, will forgive me? 


I guess you’re wondering how the story ends? I don’t know. 

Happy birthday AID my friend! I will forever remember you. 


So guys, have you ever had to forget someone you care about, how did it feel? 

Have you come across an old extremely close friend who has forgotten all about you?